"Shut the f*** up!"...

Those are the exact words that I heard from my boss one day last week. I wasn't in any sort of trouble. I had done nothing wrong. In fact, it was she who had made the mistake. I merely pointed out the mistake to her, therefore avoiding any embarrassment that may have been bestowed about my boss or the university.

It all started one early morning in the University Center. There were early arrivals coming that weekend so we had to stuff envelopes with information that they would need for move in. The stacks of paper seemed endless and I couldn't help but feel bad for the 500 trees that were killed. We need to figure out a better system, but I am not sure how that is possible. Anyway, back to the story. As it was pretty early in the morning, I forget exactly why we were just sitting around. We may have just been waiting for people or for the rest of the things that needed to go in the envelopes, but I decided to pick up a conduct guide that we give all the students that live in the residence halls (yes, residence halls. Dorm is not considered a positive term). It's just a little booklet that has rules and policies for the residence hall. Most students probably don't read it and it's really fun to point out the rule in the book when they do break it. Sorry, I keep getting off on tangents. So, I was sitting there reading it and I closed the book and looked at the front cover. Something seemed off, but I wasn't sure what it was. Then I realized it. It had said, "Uinversity of Wisconsin". In case you didn't catch it, university was spelled. u-i-n-v-e-r-s-i-t-y. Read it again. UINVERSITY. 

I couldn't believe it. I was dumbfounded. How a university spelled university wrong baffled me. Of course, me being me, I cracked up. I showed my staff and then decided that I should probably tell my supervisor. When I went back to her office she was on the phone. The director of res life, the big wig, happened to be walking by and I showed her. "OH NO! Go tell Betty*!" Betty* is another one of my supervisors, presumedly in charge of the booklets. I showed it to her and she looked stunned. That's when she said it.  "Shut the f*** up!" I never thought I would hear those words come out of her mouth. Not that she is a goody too shoes or anything, but that's not something that you expect to hear from your boss. It was hilarious, needless to say and it pretty much made my day. 

I did feel bad though. All the books had to get reprinted and we probably killed another couple hundred trees doing so. I told her that if worse came to worse and we didn't get all the books on time, it wouldn't be a big deal. The early arrivals that were coming were football players and probably couldn't read anyway. She told me to shut the f*** up, I think I can say that to her. 

*Betty isn't her real name. If you know me though, you know exactly who I am talking about.

I can't think of a good title for this post as I am completely speechless about its topic

I wish that I could tell you that the following product is a joke. I came upon the article via a Facebook status of my friend and was left completely speechless (which you should know doesn't happen all that often). Here is the article. 

In case you thought you read it wrong, it's a doll that you breast feed. While I think that it's important to breast feed children, I don't think it's necessarily something that you want to teach young children. It seems a little premature to teach them about it and that conversation should be saved when kids can understand it a bit more. I don't necessarily agree with the arguments stating that it promotes early pregnancy, but I just think it's too mature for young kids to understand.

As you can tell, my arguments aren't well formed. Not yet anyway. I literally read this article 5 minutes ago and was thinking earlier in the day about a blog post to write and couldn't come up with anything. I guess I found it. There may be more to come about this. Who knows.

If I had an IQ higher than 42...

I would be packing right now.

I got the go ahead from my boss today to start moving into my room assignment for the year. I plan on being completely moved over there by the end of the week, despite the fact that I will be gone tomorrow and Thursday. I just really, really hate moving and I like to put it off as long as possible. Actually, it's not the moving, it's the packing and unpacking that I hate. It takes too much time and energy. Time and energy that I don't have.

It all started when I started college. Going to school out of state, I felt like I needed more than I actually did. I am always worried that I am going to need something random that I haven't used in forever so I pack it. Do I end up needing it? Nope. So packing a pair of shoes that I haven't worn in 3 years that probably don't fit ends up being a waste of space. 

Also, because I hate packing so much, I tend to put it off until the last possible minute. When I moved down to Chicago, I didn't start packing until 11 PM the night before we left. We left at 5 AM, I wasn't in a happy mood driving down there. This time is not going to be any different. My boss told me that it's better that I move in sooner rather than later, but there is not a huge hurry. I decided that I want to be moved in by Friday (I had to set my own deadline, otherwise it would never get done) which means that I am not going to start packing until Thursday night at the earliest. I didn't unpack a lot of my stuff though, so hopefully it won't be too bad.

It's going to be a long week. Luckily I have quite a few things to look forward to :)

Breaking News from River Falls, WI

Today a friend and I took a spontaneous trip to Maurices. A dangerous place for me to go because I always spend way more money than I should or have for that matter. I was searching the store for great deals (a fabulous sale, double punches when you use your card, and cute clothes) that I couldn't pass up. There were a lot of clothes that I wanted to buy, but I restrained myself for once. 

Even though I did restrain myself, there were a few items I couldn't pass up- one being a dress. Yes, I bought a dress. Now, this is unusual because I don't normally buy, much less wear, dresses unless I absolutely have to. This dress was gorgeous though and- now, I don't say this often- it looked great on me. It is long, flowy, and pretty. I really love it and can't wait to wear it.

Once I get a picture with it on, I will post it. For now, we will now send you back to your regularly scheduled programming. 

50 Random Thoughts that You Probably Don't Care About

I am kind of bored and homework doesn't seem all that appealing right now, so I decided to compile a list of 50, yes 50, things about me or that pass through my mind on a fairly regular basis. I am not doing this because I like talking about myself (well, that's not the biggest reason anyway) but more so because I wanted to challenge myself to see if I could come up with a 50 things about me that are semi-interesting. If you bore easily, I suggest you stop now. This post is probably going to be rather dull.

50) I don't feel like I watch a lot of TV, but I know I do. I try really hard not to start watching a new show because I get addicted to it easily. Then I hear my friends talking about how amazing the show is and I start watching. 

49) I will forever and always love Hanson. Yes, Hanson. If I died right now, I would die a happy woman because I saw them live for the first time last year. 

48) For whatever reason I have always had this strange feeling that I was going to die young. I don't have any desire to die, but I just get a weird feeling that it's going to happen. It's not something I am scared of. In fact, I am oddly okay with it.

47) I hate crying in front of people. When I am alone, I will blubber like an idiot. If I am around others though, I try to hold it in. Some people probably think that I don't have a soul because of it.

46) I never had a strong desire to rebel against my parents. It never made any sense to me. Maybe it's because my parents weren't very strict in the first place.

45) I am really excited to have a family, but have absolutely no desire to start one anytime soon. I want at least 3 kids.

44) The 3 people I am closest to in this world are my grandma, grandpa, and granny. I would be totally lost and a completely different person without them in my life.

43) My Granny's favorite story to tell is from when I was about 3-years-old. She was asking me about a movie I saw and asked me what theatre I went to. I replied, "at a theatre near you". We were on the bus and she said she nearly peed herself laughing.

42) I have had 3 majors in college. I am going to get my undergrad degree in communicative disorders, but I have no ambition to go into that field. I want to go into student affairs.

41) Because I want to go into student affairs, I have a pretty limited choice of grad schools, which means that I have to live somewhere away from home and that idea both excites me and scares the shit out of me.

40) The earliest memory I have is being in church with my Granny playing with my toys. I don't know why I held onto that memory

39) I have always wanted to learn to yodel, but I have heard that it's really difficult.

38) My first actual job was working at a pharmacy. I like to tell people that I sold drugs

37) I'm not really like either of my parents. I have my dad's dumb, weird sense of humor and that's about it, really.

36) When I am stressed or overwhelmed, I love taking long, hot showers. They seem to calm me down

35) I grew up having cats as pets. I have always wanted a dog though. 

34) In a period of 8 months, I went through 3 Razr cell phones. They suck.

33) I try hard to be good with money, but I am way too impulsive for my own good and it's gotten me into trouble more than a few times.

32) I lived in Chicago for about 6 months and then I realized that I wanted to be closer to home.

31) I have the best job in the world. I have seen things that I never thought I would and met people that have had a tremendous and positive impact on my life.

29) I hate dead baby jokes. They make me want to cry.

28) The Wizard of Oz will always put me in a good mood.

27) If I could sleep all day, I would. Alas, I have a little thing called class and a job that prevents me from doing so.

26) I am trying this new thing where I eat healthier. It's really difficult to do with the food they serve in our cafeteria. 

25) My idea of a fun night is just chilling with friends. Every once in awhile I have this urge to get plastered, but I would rather not spend the money. Sometimes I go to watch other people get wasted. That's always fun.

24) I hate scary movies. It takes me forever to get to sleep after I watch one.

23) My current favorite read is a book called The Shack. It's a pretty difficult read and it's taken me a long time to read because of that.

22) A lot of people think that I have a lot of patience. On the contrary, I don't with everyone. I usually have more patience with kids and my residents than with anyone else.

21) Most people can't stand vomit, blood, or anything else like that. I, surprisingly, have a strong stomach for that stuff.

20) I can't stand seeing needles being poked into skin. I don't know why, but it gives me the chills.

19) When I go home, I stay up all night watching Nick at Night. It makes me feel old that now they are playing shows from my childhood.

18) Nothing makes me happier than putting a smile on someone else's face.

17) I think I am pretty good at accepting things that I can't change. It makes me a lot happier by doing that. 

16) I am a pretty big optimist. Most people can see that as a fault, but I am a realist and I know that bad things happen. I try to see the good in situations though.

15) I hate Shia LaBeouf

14) I also hate Rachel Ray

13) I can out burp a lot of guys I know. That grosses some people out. Oh well.

12) My favorite weather is sweatshirt weather. My favorite sweatshirt to wear is my Hanson one.

11) My favorite time of the year is when hockey and baseball overlap

10) I used to microwave ice cream and then eat it with a fork

9) Unlimited texting was the best investment I ever made

8) I really want a tattoo, but my fear of needles is keeping me from that.

7) I hate when people mix up homonyms. It's not that difficult to distinguish "its" from "it's". 

6) I also dislike poor grammar in general, especially with college students. Go watch some School House Rocks and get it right.

5) That being said, I love editing papers. I became the go to person for that last year. It was so much fun, even if the boys liked to wait until the last possible minute to ask me.

4) My least favorite part of my job is the confrontation. It sucks, but I am a lot better at it than I was when I started.

3) I am so glad that I am out of middle school and high school. I have seen middle schoolers and high schoolers today and it scares me for our future.

2) For being in a job that requires organization, I am definitely not.

1) Online shopping is my guilty pleasure

"We Have Nothing to Fear but Fear Itself"

What a bunch of crap, Mr. Franklin D. Roosevelt.

I have come to the realization over the past few years that I have the most irrational fears of anyone I know. I can't pinpoint the cause of most of them. Really the only explanation is that I have completely lost my mind and should be committed to some kind of asylum. Since I will never be caught, I sit here writing this meaningless blog that a total of 2 people will probably read. It's difficult for me to dwindle my list down to only a few, but for your sake (and to a lesser extent, mine), I have done just that.

Ticks: These disease-ridden arachnids have always scared me. They are the reason that I don't like camping and avoid wooded areas whenever possible (that and I have a fear of being kidnapped. More on that later though). A few days ago was the first time in my entire life that I have ever had a tick on me and it's safe to say that I went into panic mode. They don't just crawl on you either. No, that would be too easy. They latch on you and suck the life out of you. It gives me the chills just thinking about it.

Costume Characters: I really have no idea where this fear comes from, I just know that I don't like them. Oddly enough, I did very well in Disney World. Maybe it's because we didn't stop and get pictures with a lot of them, but the ones that we did see didn't bother me. I loathe our school mascot. It's incredibly creepy. My school also does this promo for events on campus that involves someone dressing up as a gorilla. You can imagine how well that goes. The Underwater Adventures at Mall of America has a mascot that I run away from all the time. I swear, one time that thing chased me. They give me the creeps.

The Easter Bunny: Yes, I realize that the Easter Bunny is a costume character as well, but he (or she) freaks me out so much that it deserves its own spot. I remember when the fear really set in. I was shopping during the Easter season one day and, of course, there was an opportunity to get your picture taken with the Easter Bunny. I didn't get within 10 feet of the thing before I ran away. My freshman year, there was a band that played and the drummer dressed as the Easter bunny. I hate that band solely for that reason.

Being Kidnapped: Ever since I was little, this was a big fear of mine. When I was about 7 years old, I was at home and my grandma called. She had heard on her police scanner that there was a blue van that was trying to pick up kids in our neighborhood. At least I am pretty sure that's what she said. I didn't trust anyone in a blue van after that and I generally started not trusting people either. Especially people that drove something that looks like this.

This all explain so much that it's scary

Channing Tatum got married. My life is over!

Disclaimer: the title of this post has absolutely nothing to do with the content of the post, but I just said it out loud and I couldn't think of a more clever title.

I recently ordered and iPod Touch. Something I am very excited about and I can't wait to use it. I feel that my life will feel a little more complete with it. Thank you, materialism. I decided to track the package online because I wanted to see when it's supposed to arrive. 

What follows is quite possibly the most confusing and illogical thing I have ever seen in my life. Proceed with caution and don't say that I didn't warn you.